I notice how in the past I have experienced turmoil and like a robot, tried to convince myself "I choose peace.......i choose peace...." I'm not sure if it ever worked...but in some way, I believe it helped get me back to peace just by changing my focus. And as my old life coach used to say, "Fake it till ya make it!"
Today I was reflecting on how we do that and realized (since Byron Katie entered my life) how choosing peace for me, has come from a much different place. It's like, something "bad" happens and I don't even think there's anything wrong with it anymore. Someone says some dumb shit and I find where they are right. And then I thank them and acknowledge them! What the?!
Example; The other evening I'm walking by myself in my neighborhood around dinner time, apparently looking quite bootylicious and 3 high school boys come walking towards me. As we pass each other one of them smacks me on the ass! In slow motion, as if I were an observer, I turn and notice them starting to run away... then as they noticed my lack of reaction one of them says, "You're just gonna let him disrespect you like that miss?"
I turned around, smiled, and kept moving forward without saying a word. I felt total peace.
Then I noticed myself having the thought, "If I were a teenage boy with raging hormones and I saw me sauntering down the street in these jeansI wouldn't have been able to help myself either."
The slap might have jolted me a little but in a matter of seconds I was grounded in peace.
Who that boy grows up to be, who his parents are and how they are teaching or not teaching their son to be a man is none of my business. I instantly found him right.
ALL I am concerned with (and I do mean ALL) is MY peace of mind. Who "I" am as a woman...FULL....whole and complete...grounded, peaceful, awesome, happy, prosperous, joyous, healthy. Who "I" am as a mother when I go home and feed my kid dinner or wake up with him on a weekend morning... who am I with HIM? HOW am I with him? That's it. That's literally ALL I am concerned with.
It brings ME peace to find that kid right.
So I do.
The lady who pushed pass me to get on the bus before me...I noticed myself thinking, "She must REALLY need to get on this bus more than I do." I found her right and felt peace. Next thing I know she's turning around apologizing to me saying, "Now I don't know why I just did that. We're all getting on the same bus and I just cut in front of you, I'm sorry." I said, "It's ok, I figured you really needed to get on." We smiled and it was done.
I notice how often I am doing this automatically now a days... and it makes me smile.
Such an easier existence.
Thank you Me <3
Go ahead. Smack it. I don't mind. lol